Key Question: *Is it difficult for you to find a spanker with similar interests and chemistry as your own or is it difficult for a spanker to find a spankee with similar interests and chemistry as your own?*
I have often found that it is very difficult to find a spanker that matches my personality. There have been many that came SO close...but no cigar. I have found a few that matched me online but once I met them the chemistry just wasn't there which was a huge letdown for me. I'd imagine it was the same feeling for them. That's why I have doubts about online dating working. I must admit though that I have a very good friend whom none of you know, James. He met Jenn (and now she's a good friend) online at www.faithbase.net and she moved here from New York City. They just got engaged and they seem to be incredibly happy. I had my doubts and I'm usually right about those things, but they got me this time. They're moving away to Colorodo Sunday. *sigh* I'll miss them. My best friend Chastin, and her husband Chad met on www.match.com and obviously they got married...so...
Anyways, I think I got a tad bit off subject there and apparently advertised for a couple sites, I should get paid, haha. I apologize for that. Where was I? Oh. Online dating works for some. I don't believe it works for many. It's going to have to work for me or I'll never get married. The only way I'll be truly completely happy is with spanking and Arkansas seems to be sparce with spankers...let me rephrase that...Arkansas seems to be sparce with sane spankers.
Now, as I've said I have met some guys online that I felt a lot of chemistry for. The horrible part is when you realize they don't feel the same thing for you. It's very disheartening. Honestly, I've had a few people (non-spankos) around my area ask me out on dates. I just couldn't do it. Been there, done that. Dated someone, and once I found myself I told him I was a spanko...he tried it and there just came a point to where he couldn't do it anymore. We were engaged. 5 years. I feel bad for him because he really did try...things just slowly fell apart after that and I blame myself for everything, even if it wasn't intentional. So, my new avenue is meeting spankos first, getting to know a little about them first, then getting to know their exact interests in spanking, then getting to know about their lives and interests more in depth.
Sometimes I think I'm too picky. Think so?
My God, I Just Had A Grand Mal Seizure.
6 years ago
3 comments:
Well, first off, faithbase.com can't pay you anything because it doesn't exist anymore, so :p At least, that's what it said when I clicked on the URL.
Anyway, you're right about online dating - frankly, it's a bit of a nuisance, but at the same time, it's quite valuable. As you'll likely have heard before, it's easier to sometimes start out talking with people that way, because there's literally no possible form of physical chemistry, so you can't form much in the way of opinions about how the other person likes, and vice versa. That leaves two things: personality and interests. For the most part, the latter is the one you establish most quickly, but even then, that can very much be one of those things that could be exaggerated or simply lied about. Same goes for personality, but that's also just how it goes.
For me, I've known a lot of people online over the years, and I know quite a few of them very well, and have met up with many (no spankos, though!). Most of the time, I find it's best to talk to them verbally and what have you prior to meeting - Skype is a great medium for that, and I tend to use it a lot, myself. Anyway, I'm apparently going off-topic, too :p
It IS hugely difficult finding other spankos to relate to, but the way I look at it, that'll be true for anyone you share interests with. You'll make friends with a few, but you'd be very lucky to click with one on a level that might lead to a relationship later on. And that's bothered me quite a bit since I started getting into spanking: I want a relationship which incorporates it, and I don't think I'd enjoy a relationship quite as much if it wasn't present. And then there are moments when you have to wonder 'am I ever going to find myself a spanking partner that I care about enough to spend my life with?'. And that's a big problem, but the way I figure it, that's what I want, so I don't mind waiting for it, if need be.
As it is, I don't think you're too picky, or if you are, only so much as would be appropriate, given the circumstances. Either you'll settle for someone less than what you want, or you have to be patient and hold out for what you DO want - and settling for second best really would suck. So keep your chin up, huh?
www.faithbase.com is the correct link. Lol. Not .net.
Yeah, I do sometimes regret becoming…or rather being born a spanko. It seems to limit a lot of things in my life. Ah yes, the lying. I have run across that a few times too, just so they can try to get me quicker. The agreeance with my views, when in fact they are not at all their views, annoys me to the extreme. I’m more likely to respect and like somebody more if they are honest with who they are. I can usually tell when people are lying to me though. Usually.
You’ve never met any spankos? Wow. I’m surprised. Ah, I see…Skype is the deal here, no wonder you were making me wait…I hadn’t read the post yet. I’m not so mad anymore. Tehehe. I’m very sorry about that.
I completely agree with your strategy. That’s how I have grown to look at it. I want to be happy and I know what makes me happy and I refuse to live my life without the spanking, also without the common personality, interests and chemistry. I know he’s out there and I don’t mind waiting for it either, and I will, but I just have no patience and that angers me.
Thank you. I don’t think I’m too picky really. I have a feeling if I ended up choosing second best I would be ruining another person’s life in the process as well as my own. I know it would end in divorce eventually and I refuse to put anyone through that kind of pain. It’s just wrong and against my morals.
Keeping my chin up,
*Kimmie*
P.S. You're right, it's just an ordinary brush. I looked at it way too quickly. I'm sorry. :(
No, you aren't being to picky at all. From what little I've read of your blog so far, this is something you very much want in your life,and you certainly aren't going to be happy if it isn't there.
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