So, I went to visit my counselor the other day and finally...after 2 years...confessed to her about my "kink." A good friend of mine helped me gather up the courage to let her in on my dirty little secrets. So, thank you (you know who you are ;-)) You may not be surprised to find out that she wasn't at all surprised that that was my "thing," because of my struggle with cutting.
She told me that it wasn't at all abnormal to be into spanking, even the disciplinary side of it. She even gave me examples, without mentioning names, of people that had the same cravings as I! I thought this was just great!! I mean, not at ALL the response I was expecting to get out of her! She even encouraged me to go to local spanking group play meetings. I told her of my fear of ending up with someone who was truly abusive and we went over safety tips. Of course, I already had been using all of them (safe words, safety calls, etc.) except for the fact that I have never met with any local group. I've always been too afraid/self-conscious...due to my overwhelming anxiety and all that other junk. I'm thinking I will start slowly by meeting a few people at a time. I already am in correspondence with one couple in Little Rock and I am excited about meeting them in the semi-near future. She also told me not to try to "get rid" of this side of me because it will never go away. I've tried this many times in the past and it definitely never went away. And, so...I'm embracing it! Carefully.
However, it worries me that maybe she only said these things because she was afraid of what I might do if she had shown me disapproval. But, I hardly think that she would have spoken so in depth with me about it...and known so much about it...if that were the case. *shrugs* I don't know.
The main point of this post is that my counselor told me to try not to dabble too far into the BDSM aspect. The session ended, so we didn't get any further. Why would she warn me of this?
Thanks for reading,
*Kimmie* :)
My God, I Just Had A Grand Mal Seizure.
6 years ago
3 comments:
Because there are a lot of aspects to BDSM that are not that good at positive reinforcement - I'm pretty sure you've bumped into people where they have the Dom/Master/Top demeaning the Sub in both verbal and physical ways, which works if you feel secure in yourself and you WANT that, but if your self-esteem isn't that great, eventually it can only serve to erode that which you already exists. As you can imagine, that's NOT good.
Plus, of course, there are the natural risks of other BDSM practices: cutting, asphyxiation to name just two, and she's probably concerned for your safety, too. At least a spanking isn't life-threatening or overly risky :p
Well, that makes sense. I have bumped into MANY of those personality types, for sure! I can't stand it and I generally just ignore them or tell them I'm not interested.
Yeah, there are some risky fetishes out there! So, yes safety would be a good concern. Thanks for clearing that up for me :)
And, who says spanking isn't life-threatening...I think it just may be, especially risky!! No spankings! None! ;)
Nonsense.
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