Control Issues

My fiance (Oh, yes! I'm engaged!) has brought to my attention that I have a major issue with control. I try to control anything and everything around me. I always knew I did...but it didn't truly hit me until he sat me down and told me. I get very upset and moody when I can't control a situation. I think this is the reason I get angry sometimes when I'm being spanked, even when I want to be spanked! It's ridiculous, yet I still can't completely just let go. When receiving a spanking it always seems to go from anger (from the fact that I feel like I can not take the pain so I get angry at myself and take it out on others sometimes...) to laughing when the endorphins kick in. It has been pointed out to me that it can be quite distracting in videos. I need to find a way to overcome this. Anyways, I'm a bit distracted at the moment so I'll be back later, perhaps.

Love to all!

*Kimmie*